My heart is a funny place
by burn my mind
Summary: The air had tasted like Champagne and sparkles and the finest things in the world. SN. Always. Serena\Nate. Drabble.


**Title: **My heart is a funny place.

**Summary: **The air had tasted like Champagne and sparkles and the finest things in the world. SN. Always. Serena\Nate. Drabble.

**Authors Note: **I'm sick and really bored tonight and I have an overload of spoby feels but I'm trying to write a decent piece for PLL so I've been writing nonsense GG oneshots. If you do however read "Who am I?" the next chapter I post is one of my favorites.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

* * *

She's all blonde hair, long legs, short dress, high heels, bright blue eyes, snorting cocaine and sex appeal. Chewing on her lower lip, flicking her hair over her shoulder as she leans in closer to whisper in your ear. She's all gold, golden hair, golden dresses, golden bangles, golden earrings, the golden girl.

And.

You've loved her for as long as you can remember.

She's it for you. She's the one. You want to marry her. You want to have children with her.

Blair, she's not like Serena. She's not right for you, you love the girl. You always will.

But, Serena.

(She's perfect, wonderful, intoxicating.)

She's the very best drug, the most addicting, the one that makes you feel the best.

And her legs are wrapped around your waist, her arms curled around your neck and your mouths fused together.

And you're high most of the time, you don't remember half of the things that have happened to you.

But you know this is the best.

This is the most precious moment in your entire life, she's forbidden fruit but she's _yours_.

Her golden hair, and her golden limbs, and her golden dress and her, the golden girl.

"I love you," You breath but she can't hear you.

(And if she can she decides to ignore it, ignore you and that can't be an option.)

Your mind has always been a messy place but your heart is a funny place.

"This is wrong," It's just a whisper, the words flowing out of her mouth softly and disappearing into the air as quickly as they had arrived.

It's wrong but you don't need to think about how handing your virginity to your girlfriend's best friend on a golden platter is wrong.

And how can something so wrong feel so _right? _

It's always been the two of you. Always.

It was the two of you running towards the set of swings at the playground, blonde hair flying everywhere, blue eyes glinting in the summer sun. Jumping onto the black seats, pushing your feet onto the ground and sending yourself up into the air. The two of you flying as high as you can go, Serena deciding to be brave and letting go of the handles on both sides of her. You wanting to show off and jumping off of the swing while it was still in mid air, your feet landing on the bark with a crunch.

It was the two of you against the world. It _is _the two of you against the world.

But you can't think straight because all you see is _her_. Her brilliant blue eyes shining with lust, her red lips descending towards yours, her cheeks flushed pink. Your arms wound around her waist, pulling her closer, pulling her tighter.

You remember first meeting her. It was before school, you had all meet before school at one point or another. You had gone over to Lily's for a play-date with her daughter and her baby son. You must of been three, it's your earliest memory. You don't remember that much, just the fact that Serena was wearing a blue dress that was stained with tomato sauce and her lips were curled into a cheeky grin. Her eyes - you remember those eyes, so blue. Like your own. Her lips had kissed your cheek and she had thrust her hand out towards you.

She's not like everybody else. She never has been.

(But she is just like everybody else, sex, lies, money, drugs.)

And then it's all over. He falls asleep, dreaming of them finally being together. He would break it off with Blair in the morning.

And then he awakens and she's gone. She's done a _runner_. He just another one of her one night stands, never to be seen again.

You _love _her and she's _gone_.

You call Lily up, asking to speak to Serena and she tells you that she's at _Boarding School_.

You were just her last fling in New York before she moved away.

You stay with Blair but your mind is permanently attached to a certain long legged, blue eyed, blonde.

And for a second your life was complete, the air had tasted like Champagne and sparkles and the finest things in the world. Her lips had tasted like whiskey and cigars and your heart had been beating so fast you were sure it would explode.

And then it burst up into fireworks, into flames and it was gone as quickly as it started.


End file.
